Twenty One
I can buy beer now.
I know that sounds like a stupid thing to be hung up on, but it is just such a shock to realize that right now, or at almost any given moment, I can go to a store and get tanked. The days of scrambling for buyers or hoping to god someone at the party has something for sale are gone.
This is the first birthday since I turned sixteen that I have truely felt like a different person after it happened.
It's just shock. Eventually it will wear off and it will become as mundane as buying a pack of cigarettes. On the flip side though, there is a huge amount of responsibility that comes along with being twenty one, and I hope I'm strong enough to handle it.
The first big thing I need to keep tabs on is providing for minors. I don't mind doing it for people I trust, but what happens if I got a providing for minor charge? That would severeally alter who I hope to be in five or ten years. I have been given a gift to work with children. I would like to be able to use that gift to help as many of them as I can. Nothing will end an interview with a prospective employer in this field faster than a providing for minors conviction.
The second is driving. As a firm opponent of drunken driving, I need to be aware of how I am getting home and how much I should drink before it happens. I would hate to be responsible for someone's death because I drank too much.
The third, and biggest thing is that alcohol can be fun, but could it end up being too fun? Alcoholism runs in my family. My grandfather was a horrible person when he was at the peak of his addiction. I would hate to follow in his footsteps. There are too many people who care about me to throw my life away like that, but sometimes you can be so into something that everyone else and everything else ceases to matter.
I'm sure I'm being over-analytical. I have a reasonable grasp of what is important to me, and I know that this could end up being a very positive thing (I sound like Penelope). These are just a muddled version of the thoughts in my head right now. Now that I can legally drink, I need to be careful.
I know that sounds like a stupid thing to be hung up on, but it is just such a shock to realize that right now, or at almost any given moment, I can go to a store and get tanked. The days of scrambling for buyers or hoping to god someone at the party has something for sale are gone.
This is the first birthday since I turned sixteen that I have truely felt like a different person after it happened.
It's just shock. Eventually it will wear off and it will become as mundane as buying a pack of cigarettes. On the flip side though, there is a huge amount of responsibility that comes along with being twenty one, and I hope I'm strong enough to handle it.
The first big thing I need to keep tabs on is providing for minors. I don't mind doing it for people I trust, but what happens if I got a providing for minor charge? That would severeally alter who I hope to be in five or ten years. I have been given a gift to work with children. I would like to be able to use that gift to help as many of them as I can. Nothing will end an interview with a prospective employer in this field faster than a providing for minors conviction.
The second is driving. As a firm opponent of drunken driving, I need to be aware of how I am getting home and how much I should drink before it happens. I would hate to be responsible for someone's death because I drank too much.
The third, and biggest thing is that alcohol can be fun, but could it end up being too fun? Alcoholism runs in my family. My grandfather was a horrible person when he was at the peak of his addiction. I would hate to follow in his footsteps. There are too many people who care about me to throw my life away like that, but sometimes you can be so into something that everyone else and everything else ceases to matter.
I'm sure I'm being over-analytical. I have a reasonable grasp of what is important to me, and I know that this could end up being a very positive thing (I sound like Penelope). These are just a muddled version of the thoughts in my head right now. Now that I can legally drink, I need to be careful.
posted by Dan at
1:45 AM
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