Fuck Pluto

The recent decision by the International Astronomy Agency to reclassify objects in the Solar System created lots of controversy around the world, particularly with a new label for Pluto.

From now on the three categories of objects in this system are planets, dwarf-planets, and misc. and Pluto falls into the dwarf-planet criteria along with its moon Charon and the asteroid Ceres.

I applaud the IAA for this decison. Pluto is not a planet and it's about time someone did something about it.

When Percivil Lowell discovered Pluto in the early 1930's the object was too far away to be accurately observed. The scientists of the time calculated the approximate size using infrences based on Keplers laws of planetary motion. A sound idea. The problem discovered later on is Planet X's gravitational pull skewed the numbers making Pluto seem bigger.

The facts of the matter are Pluto's radius is about the size of the Midwest. It's smaller than our moon, barely twice the size of its own, and roughly the size of Ceres.

Now the Solar System consists of rocky planets in the first four rows, asteroids in the aisle and gas giants in the back.

I wonder if the IAA caved into a little pressure that forced the category "dwarf planet" to come about. I personally would have gone with Planets and Misc., but hey that's just me.

Cindy Kubick-Lange at the Lincoln Journal Star seems to have experianced some emotional trauma at the loss of Pluto. I wouldn't recomend listening to her during the great Robot Wars of '07. She felt it neccessary to kill some of her paper's credibility in an opinion piece titled "The Pain of Losing Pluto."

(This is from an earlier essay I wrote. It will be a little redundant but I don't care)

The Joy of “Losing” Pluto

I recently read an article by Cindy Lange-Kubick in the Journal Star about the agony she experienced due to the reclassification of Pluto last week. I feel this needed to be responded to.
She argues that since Pluto has been a planet her whole life, it should be kept one.
The facts clearly contradict her logic.
The radius of Pluto is slightly larger than the Midwest. It’s smaller than the earth’s moon and the asteroid Ceres. If the smashed remnants of the planet that could have been between Jupiter and Mars can be considered a planet, how many other objects can be classified can be considered planets? Hell, Pluto’s moon Charon is half the size of the object it orbits, and it only orbits Pluto half the time, Pluto orbits Charon the other half of the time.
Scientists reclassify things all the time. I know there was a time when the earth was considered flat, all life was formed in seven days and rockets couldn’t function in space. These were all changed, so why can’t planet standards?
When Pluto was discovered by Percival Lowell in the thirties it was thought to be twice as big as it turned out to be. Astronomers tried to declassify Pluto in the seventies when the error of their ways was discovered, only to be thwarted by a world-wide campaign of emotional blackmail by elementary students demanding Pluto remain a planet.
Fuck you, Cindy.
The people who decided the status of Pluto are professionals, dedicated men and women who spent decades studying the skies. You’re a small city journalist echoing the moronic sentiments of people who grew up so blinded by asinine tradition they can’t see the bullshit.
The human mind is organized to categorize. It’s part of our nature. Now the planets fit into a more sensible scheme. The rocky kids in the front, you know the ones with atmospheres and proportional satellites, the big bad ass gas giants in back and the stupid balls of ice floating in the background.
I’m glad the International Astronomy Agency made this decision. I’m glad the few scientists entrusted with this quandary made the right choice, and I pray that they maintain integrity by sticking to their guns.